To Live Again…

photo of sunflower

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I see Sunflowers still…

so vividly in places unexpected…

I feel my Bobby’s presence…

probably making sure I’m alright…

wanting to take care of me…

not wanting me to get hurt…

A good thing for me…

feeling his love still…

**************************************************

Taking wallpaper off my kitchen…

NOT FUN!…

but, is an achievement…

After Bobby passed I was so bad physically and mentally…

gaining weight…

not caring what I wore…

“I”… had ceased to exist really…

Time was centered on my Bobby…

Appointments…

Chemo treatments and scans…

and then 3 years had passed…

and my every moment was totally in “care” mode to make him as comfortable as possible…

Not one moment would I take back…

I totally adored my LOVE…

and to care for that person is ultimate…

But, now…

I am feeling myself coming back…

like I have had a good fresh drink of water…

given a little fertilizer…

and pampered back to the living…

I feel my body responding with more energy…

my mind clearing…

actually thinking for myself and seeing me blossom a little as the flowers do with the care the Lord shines down on them…

I feel the Lord has put special people in my life lately…

showing me I will make it…

making me smile and laugh again…

feeling my God’s loving arms around me…

taking my hand and leading me forward…

I pray every day for my Jesus to guide me on the right path…

I lean on Him more now than ever…

I’m a vulnerable creature…

Heartache and pain can do this…

but, each time I pray…

the answers are as clear as bright sunshine on water…

clouds dawn lake landscape

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So…

I will be led by Him…

and learn to grow in another direction…

the future for my life…

a wonderful newness…

and with determination I will get the wallpaper off…

stand tall… breathe…

and wait for the next project and adventures of this new journey…

some small accomplishments and…

some joyous in discovering “me” again…

 

 

 

 

 

 

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7 thoughts on “To Live Again…

  1. This is a wonderful testimony to the faithfulness of God. He knows our needs and the exact moment we need help and encouragement. It’s good to have those people in your life who can help bring a smile to your face and speak into your life as they walk beside you. God bless you in your journey to wholeness once again.

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