Tag Archive | Marriage

Love That Sustains…

I attended a 50th Wedding Anniversary Celebration and Renewal of Vows Ceremony last weekend…

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half century… filled with pain… sorrow… happiness… joy… and births k9200549 of three children…

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Now there are Grandchildren and Great-Grandchildren…

Amazing?… I don’t think so… I call it a gift!… k4558753

A gift of love and the presence of God in their lives…

A tenderness… that shines through… holding each other up in the hard timesk12217398 … and the laughter and sweetness in good times

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I’m sure there were many conversations… many hugs in the nighttears shed for loved ones… smiles for the funny things that can happen within a family

The marriage between two people is the beginning of what should be…

a life of learning with each other…mardep0107s

You take the good with the bad

through sickness and healthu11157633

and learn from all of the experiences

My husband and myself have 6 more years until we celebrate this accomplishment

Today… a younger couple will be joined in our family…

Nothing new… we have a large family

But, it will be new with these newlyweds…k12134971

Of course times have changedu22656865

Innocence is not as common now…

Money is more available through education and working hard…

Both man and woman usually have their own careers

Sometimes there are children already in the picture…

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I wish with all my heartcfr0006 that the love these young adults feel for each other today…

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will last another 50 years k5238946 … and a celebration with the family they make u24064584will be able to share in the love that has sustained time

Good Luck and Much Happiness Tyler and Desire’

Daily Prompt: Happily Ever After

“And they lived happily ever after.” Think about this line for a few minutes. Are you living happily ever after? If not, what will it take for you to get there?

What did it take for me to reach where I am?

We all have our ideas as to what “Happily Ever After means… Fairytales always seem to end with that comment…k12768952

I find life is not that way…

It is a mixture of good/bad… k6035688

sad/happy… rich/poor… k2340514

love/hate… k12681164

faith/wandering… k2177044

and in the end or near the end of life… if we can say, “I am happy!”… that’s a lot!…

The reference up above says…”and THEY lived happily ever after… Of course they can be one… or in my aspect… with my partner… my husband

My son said once, “Marriage is forever!”… or so he thought… He wanted what his Mom and Dad had… He seemed to feel we were in it for the long haul… and we were!…

“To death do us part!” was taken seriously… in our vows…

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His didn’t quite work out that way at first… k8159527

but, now many years later… I believe he has found his “Happily Ever After” too…

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All of our “Happys” are different… It’s where we find our contentment…

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I can do without very well… where others can’t…

I can love one person forever… some can’t!….

I can see the wisdom learned in enduring hard timesk11172032

… others can’t!…

I can feel the love emanating from all kinds of people… others can’t feel it!…

I can see how being there for others can bring me happiness… others can’t begin to feel it!…

I can be happy with my imperfectionsk12375672 whereas others struggle with being perfect!…

So, yes… I feel I’m living Happily Ever After.. k3441818

because I wake up with good thoughts… feeling loved… and thankful for every day!

Daily Prompt : Proud / The Daily Post

When was the last time someone told you they were proud of you?

I don’t know that the word “proud” was used… but, I’ve been complimented many times…

Is that the same???

People tell me I’m talented… That I have an eye for decorating k3565296… That I’m a good person in how I treat others talatv0586s … That I’m loved 038a9214… Things like that…

Proud to me always meant I had achieved a certain accomplishment

A good grade on a test… something to be proud of… k3819626

Graduating…. something to be proud of… nri0296

Stepping up a grade in your job… something to be proud of… sca0396

Raising great kids… something to be proud of… k10046704

Having a lasting marriage… something to be proud of…k12262413

Working hard to achieve your ambitions… something to be proud of… k7927353

I’ll take the compliments… That’s something I’m proud of…k11205161

How I Grew Up…

Memory…

This is copied from an email I received from a friend… It touched me in that it described how I grew up… Maybe you will find similarities too…

I grew up with practical parents. A mother, who washed aluminum foil after she cooked in it, then reused it. She was the original recycle queen, before they had a name for it… ( Mom actually did this… even the styrofoam ones)… A father who was happier getting old shoes  fixed than buying new ones. ( I remember riding with him to the shoe repair man to get new soles put on his shoes up at a little shopping center not too far from our house)…

Their marriage was good, their dreams focused. (Both of my parents had been married before… Mom bringing two children into the marriage… and then my parents having us 3 additional children…We were all treated pretty equal…and we knew “our” parents loved us)… Their best friends lived barely a wave away. ( Even though we lived in the county on eight acres of land  my Dad had bought when he came out of the service… NAVY… we knew everyone along the road from one end to the other  )…

I can see them now, Dad in trousers, dress shirt and a hat ( I mainly picture my Dad in white overalls…a painter’s hat…and carrying his lunch box… He was a wallpaper hanger  )…and Mom in a house dress, lawn mower in one hand , and dish-towel in the other. (That describes my Mom to a tee… Printed house dresses… raising chickens …cooking like no one else could… cutting the grass… raising veggies and flowers)… It was the time for fixing things. A curtain rod, the kitchen radio, screen door, the oven door, the hem in a dress. ( Mom as well as Dad could repair about anything… I just told my husband today… I could repair the screen  in some windows we have… I’ve done it before… learning from Mom and Dad)… Things we keep. Dads with paint brushes, hammer, digging in the garden. ( Dad built two homes for us… with his own two hands and little help… I can’t remember him saying he couldn’t do anything!… He always tried! … His tools were kept in good shape… always put back where they belonged… Hammers… saws… nails… paint… brushes… You name it… and he had it!) Coming home tired after working long hours!… ( I remember meeting my Dad at his truck… carrying in his lunch box … and him kidding me in some way about whether I was a “baggy pants” or a “pesticator”… I always answered “pesticator”… No way was I a baggy pants!

It was a way of life, and sometimes it made me crazy … all that re-fixing, eating, renewing, I wanted just once to be wasteful. Waste meant affluence. Throwing things away meant you knew there’d always be more.
( I swore I would use as much water as I wanted to when I grew up!… We had to have water delivered in a big truck and put in a cistern… because we lived so far out in the county… so water was used sparingly… And I have to say… I do water my flowers… let the water run over my feet and legs while I’m washing things down after cutting grass … take a long bath with the tub filled up with bubbles and I let my Grandkids play with the water hose when they are over)…

But then my mother died, and on that clear summer’s night, in the warmth of the hospital room, I was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn’t any more. ( My Mom died in January… winter… at the age of 98… She was the next to last of a line of wonderful strong women… Only a sister left when she passed out of 12 children… She had lived with me for 5 years until at age 93 she fell and broke her hip… Nursing home after that with my sister and I taking turns… every night putting her to bed) …Then my father died… all the help he gave, helping fix things will never be again! ( My Dad had passed 19 years before my Mom of a heart attack  … Only 79… but, had lived a rich full life… even at that… The funeral home was so full… that we were elbow to elbow… an awesome sight… and the love and memories flowing was just a pull at the heart! and yes… I wished for him many times for advice and his helping hand )… 

Sometimes, what we care about most gets all used up and goes away too soon…. never to return. So, while we have it… it’s best we love it …. And care for it… And fix it when it’s broken… And heal it when it’s sick… It’s best to overlook the small things! (We always tried to make up if there were differences of opinions … we learned that early in life… and I’m sure it was from our parents)

This is true for marriage … and old cars … and children with bad report cards … and dogs with bad hips… and aging parents… and grandparents. We keep them because they are worth it, because we are worth it. ( My husband and I have been married 43 years… have two lovings sons…and three wonderful grandchildren… No!…it’s not been a perfect life… but, we loved hard… said we were sorry  many times… gave hugs and kisses to take the hurts away… helped each other get through what hardships we had to face)… Some things we keep. Like a best friend that moved away or a classmate we grew up with. ( I’m having my 45th High School Class Reunion in October… and thank goodness I stay in touch with quite a few… Of course there’s been many other friends… from work… from meetings I attend… from old neighborhoods…and some family members I feel are friends also)…

There are just some things that make life important, like people we know who are special… And so, we keep them close! ( I have these type of people in my life… aren’t I lucky!) …

I received this from someone who thinks I am a “keeper”… so I’m blogging  this to people I think of in the same way… Now it’s your turn to send this to those people that are “keepers” in your life.

Good friends are like stars  …. You don’t always see them, but you know they are always there. Keep them close!

What Is Marriage All About?

Memory…

My best friend… the companion … lover … protector… favorite comedian… hard-working… man who I married … had a Birthday  … Sometimes he called it the birthday “on hold”… 69 years… doesn’t want to even talk about the next one  … shhhh…

I’ve known him over 43 years… and he can still surprise me

We’ve never been wealthy … far from it… but, we’ve worked together to make ends meet…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

We had two sons together … and love them with all our hearts… They joke about their Dad and “his sayings”…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

We were separated when he went to Vietnam… but, wrote every day … and even sent tapes… to keep in touch… and vowed  that we would never be apart again… and we haven’t except for a few days at a time…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

We’ve had a few ailments… His was pretty major with a triple by-pass… Mine only gall bladder surgery and babies… Standing beside each other through all…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

Our son’s have had some struggles… like all people do… and we tried to be there for them… and we are being blessed now… with wonderful “thank you’s”     all of the time…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

We have also been blessed!… and I don’t use the word “blessed”   lightly… to have 3 wonderful grandchildren… They make us laugh… cry… and have given us a feeling in our hearts that nothing can describe…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

We have a house… More than I could ever imagined when I was young… Not huge… not in a high-class neighborhood… but, it has become our “home”… and when a house becomes a “home” … that’s a good thing!…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

We have tried to give each other freedom to be ourselves… Me with my computer and art work… and many excursions with my women friends… Him… working in his yard  … tinkering with his mechanics … swinging in his favorite swing he built… (relaxation time)…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

My Bobby… and I do call him, “My Bobby”… because he is!… has given me a good life… He always wishes there was more he could have given me… and I tell him…”I have it all!… there’s nothing I need”… and the “world” is just not mine to have… because he would try to give it to me if he could… and I know that!…

Isn’t that what marriage is all about!…

This has gone completely in another direction  … as always… when I start to write… but, maybe this is my way of telling “my Bobby”… Happy Birthday Babe!… and may we celebrate many more together!

Love, M.

Those “Diamond” Years!

The following is a post from last year…

Since then we have celebrated another year together…44 years!…

There is no gem to represent this year… no flower

The modern version of traditions for this gift giving anniversary… can you believe… is groceries“…

Now don’t get me wrong… a few staples in the house is great but, let’s get real… How do you express your love and commitment with groceries

I guess you could prepare a nice meal with the groceries…

Make out a grocery list???

Maybe go grocery shopping together… Really sounds like a blast to me…

I think I’ll just look forward to my 45th…”Sapphires”!

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reposted from a blog I wrote a year ago…

On February 1st… I will have been married  to my Bobby for 43 years… This is not a year that people think of as special like your 25th Silver  or your 50thGold… The traditional gifts to be given or received for the 1st year of marriage through the 20th seem to be useful or fun things… paper … wood … flowers … pottery … lace… etc. … As we gain more years I guess we think of more expensive things… Like I said… Silver for 25th …and then there’s Pearl for 30 Coral for 35 Ruby for 40 Sapphire for 45 Gold for 50 Emerald for 60  and Diamond   for any years pass that… At one time 40 seemed a long way off… and now it has come and passed… I feel every year is special!… The earlier years of struggling… setting up housekeeping… I loved being able to decorate my first home…Learning to buy big items like cars and a home …our first car we paid cash for from the money saved while Bobby was in Viet Nam…a gold Chevrolet “Nova” with “Rally Wheels”...We were so cool! … Then starting jobs/careers… Bobby looking so hard for work after getting out of the service… finally working on fork-lift trucks for his life-long career… And I working with Special Needs Kids for 30 of those years… Getting to really know each other’s ways… Bobby being my guinea pig for my cooking … Starting a family… I remember discussing how many children we wanted to have… seemed simple enough… two kids at the most and boys it was! ha, ha!… Didn’t actually know the facts about that… Money  for food, clothing, education, trips, cars, boyfriends/girlfriends, their wants, their needs… Their marriages or decision not to marry, their personalities, their starting a family of their own … A repeat of all of the above starting over for a new generation… As we are grow older together… there are health issues, money problems, political differences, family problems, religious discussions, just everyday life in general… Happiness and sadness … Us wanting to be ourselves... being independent souls… but, knowing we are not that anymore…We are “one”… a decision we made many years ago… a decision I think about but, don’t regret… I have decided marriage for me is always having that one special person who will accept me for me!… and I him for him… It’s funny how much closer you become as the years fly by… and they do fly by… We now have three beautiful, smart and fun grandchildren… Two girls and one boy … The loves of our lives like our boys… We have become content to just be with each other under any circumstance but, have not lost the spark  we saw and felt in each other those 43 years ago when we both were young, carefree and looking for love… I’m sure glad we found each other… Looking forward to those “Diamond” years!